20 Signs of Attraction At Work – Does Your Male Coworker Like You?

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male attraction at work

Everybody has an office crush. In an office environment there will always be at least one man that makes you think “he’s a bit of me”. It could be your boss, the intern, or even the postman! But how do you know whether the feeling is mutual? To be sure that he’s into you as much as you’re into him, look out for these 19 signs.

His Sits With His Legs Apart

If a man is attracted to you, it’s quite likely that when he sits in front of you his legs will be wide apart. Sitting more expansively can be a signal which demonstrates dominance and sexual attraction. If a man does this, he is literally telling you “this is all of me – come and get it”. His crotch will be front and centre. According to a U.S study led by researcher Tanya Vacharkulksemsuk, women subconsciously find such non-verbal displays to be very attractive.

He Teases You

teases you

He may decide to tease you. In the UK this is usually referred to as ‘banter’. If your male colleague teases or makes fun of you do not be offended. It just shows that he is comfortable around you. Remember, to be able to tease someone you need to be able to have ammo. And to have ammo, you need to have spent considerable amounts of time with that person. So essentially, by teasing, you can be sure that he’s been paying a lot of attention to you, your interests and your habits.

He Blinks A Lot When He Speaks To You

zoom meeting

If your male colleague likes you he might blink more than usual. This is because when we are emotionally excited, our blink rate increases tend to increase. Scientists have shown that the average person blinks 15-20 times per minute. So he blinks more than 20 times a minute when he speaks to you, it could be a sign that your co-worker finds you attractive. This, of course, can be manipulated to your benefit. If you blink more when talking to your crush, he’ll unconsciously try to match your blink rate, to keep in sync with you – which in turn, makes you both feel more attracted to each other!

He Gets Nervous When You’re Near

he gets nervous

It doesn’t take much to get some men hot under the collar. If your colleague goes red, starts blushing, or can’t get his words out when you’re near him then he probably fancies you. You wouldn’t have to do anything in particular to make him flustered. Your sheer existence will usually be enough!

He Will Speak About Sex, A Lot

nsa relationship

If your male coworker constantly speaks about sex, and his most recent conquests, you can almost certainly be sure that he’s doing it to get your attention. He’ll be disussing sex to see how you respond to the idea of him being sexual with somebody else. Will you open up? Will you be put off? Will it make you jealous? These are all the possibilities that could be running through his mind as he discusses his weekend antics.

If he speaks about sex exclusively to you, coupled with some of the other signs like intense eye contact, spread legs, and touching, you’ll be able to know whether he wants things to go further with you, or if he’s just being boastful. If his conversations become more explicit where he discusses the use of sex toys, dream men, or ideal women, then it’s likely that he doesn’t find you attractive and views you as ‘one of the boys’. This could mean that you’re in the friendzone.

He Touches Himself

touches himself

Get your mind out of the gutter. He won’t touch himself there (hopefully). Instead, your office crush may constantly touch his hair, ruffle his fringe or smooth creases out of his shirt when he sees you coming towards him. This is called ‘preening’. Preening is an act of faked cleaning or tidying that is common in courtship rituals across the animal kingdom.

He Compliments You

compliments you

If your male coworker likes you he will pay you compliments. He may keep the compliments professional, or make them personal too. An example of a professional compliment is – “I love how organised your work planner is, you’ll have to teach me how you do it sometime”. An example of a personal compliment is “have you had your hair cut? It looks great!”.

He Goes Out Of His Way To Get Your Attention

out of his way to get your attention

Some men try to be obvious in their attempts to get your attention. If they are more extroverted they might play pranks, or try to be the centre of attention in a group situation. However, there are more subtle ways that a man might try to get your attention too. For example, he may stare at you during meetings, be extra helpful when it comes to doing admin, or offer you a lift home if you’ve been working late. These little acts of kindness go beyond what a ‘usual’ colleague would do. They show that he genuinely has feelings for you.

He 'Squares' When He Sees You

Squaring occurs when a male co-workers body posture or stance becomes broader and more angular. The shoulders go back, the chest goes out, the head tilts upwards, hips face forward and the stance widens. This ‘power move’ shows dominance. Many men believe that dominance makes them an alpha male. However, this stance can also be used when a man wants to exert dominance in a meeting. So to be sure that he’s doing this for you, rather than for those around you. You want to make sure that he ‘squares’ when there is nobody else nearby.

His Body Language Mirrors Yours

Mirroring is where another individual reflects your actions and words back at you. This the most effective way to develop a relationship with somebody you find attractive. When you lean towards him, does he lean inwards towards you? If you touch his arm to reassure him about something, does he do the same moments later? These are just two of the many examples of mirroring which could occur in the work environment. So keep your eyes peeled at all times!

He Maintains Eye Contact With You For Long Periods Of Time

eye contact

Most people tend to maintain eye-contact for 2-5 few seconds at a time during a conversation. However, if your co-worker finds you attractive he will stare longingly at you. He’ll stare beyond the point of what’s ‘acceptable’. It will feel very intense, but at least you’ll definitely know when it’s happening. If he maintains eye contact for more than 6-7 seconds, it means he’s definitely into you.

He Finds Reasons To Be Near You

he finds reasons to be near you

If your work crush finds you attractive he will find a myriad of reasons to be near you. He will volunteer to do coffee rounds with you. He will suggest that you work together on projects. You’ll probably even find him bumping into you accidentally in the stairwell.

He Asks Questions About Your Relationship

Most co-workers will speak to you about your relationship and open up about theirs too. As you often spend more of your time with your co-workers than your actual partner this isn’t uncommon. However, if a male co-worker is romantically interested in you he may press you for more information than you would ordinarily disclose. He’ll be digging to see if he can offer you something that your current partner cannot. Or, if you’re single he will use the information provided to determine how he can be the best boyfriend you’ve ever had. If he’s into you he’ll make a note of all the things that you look for in a new beau.

He Brings You Things He Knows You Like

he brings you things

Whether it’s office treats, a morning coffee, or snacks from the vending machine, if your office crush likes you he’ll bring you what he knows you like. He might pretend to do this for everybody in the office to mask his intentions. He may even deny that you’re his favourite in front of nosy co-workers. However, don’t listen to him. Men don’t go out of the way for just anybody.

His Pupils Dilate When He’s Next To You

pupils dilate

Typically when a man is attracted to you their pupils dilate (increase in size) when they are next to you. This is harder to spot than some of the other signs in this blog post. As you’ll need to be very close to each other. However, it’s one of the many tell-tale signs to add to the list. If you are actively checking his pupils – don’t make it too obvious!

He Licks His Lips When Speaking To You

lick lips

Women sometimes bite their lips if they’re interested in somebody. The male equivalent is lip licking. If your male boss or work colleague slowly licks his lips whilst staring intensely at you it’s highly likely that they are attracted to you.

He Has Given You A Special Nickname

It’s likely that your male coworker will have given you a nickname. The nickname could be completely ridiculous. It could be linked to your home town or state. It might even just be “work wife”, or “work husband”. However, it will be unique to you. It will signify that he wants to have a closer relationship with you.

His Eyebrows Will Raise During Conversations

If a man genuinely likes you, then he will pay attention to the things that you say. So if something you say particularly catches his interest he might raise his eyebrows. This is an uncontrollable micro-response. It can be feigned. But if his eyebrows raise, he leans in towards you, and he asks relevant follow-up questions it’s likely that he’ll be into you, rather than just pretending to be interested.

He’ll Undo A Few Shirt Buttons

undo shirt buttons

If he likes you you might get quite hot when you’re in his vicinity. This could mean that he starts to sweat or overheat. To counter this, he may need to undo a few buttons of his shirt to cool himself done. If you’ve approached him in his office at the end of the work, he may end up loosening his tie, and unbuttoning the top button of his shirt.

He Will Want To Hang Out After Work

hang out after work

If a man truly likes you, spending the working day with you will not be enough. He will want to spend more time with you. If you rebut his requests for one on one time, he’ll try to find ways to spend time with you in a group environment to make you feel more at ease. An example could be beer Friday’s, or leaving drinks. During out of work socials he might be more flirtatious, more affectionate or sit near you for the duration. You can choose to reciprocate if the feeling is mutual, or recoil if not. However, it’s a strong sign that your male colleague is into you.


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