Getting the spark back in a relationship is often easier said than done. If you’ve been with your partner for several years, things might start to feel ‘samey’. On top of this, looking after children, dealing with stress at work, and the little matter of a global pandemic…can add a lot of pressure. If your relationship is stuck in a rut, then I’ve got four great tips which could help you get the spark back.
The pandemic ruined our sex life
The intensity of the global pandemic and the forced lockdowns were a challenge for everybody. Distance makes the heart grow fonder and being in lockdown with your other half, 24/7, may well have been just too much. Not to mention adding in the general nervousness around the safety of your loved ones is enough to hamper any sexual feelings. Don’t worry, you’re not alone! if you have managed to get through 2020 and 2021 and you’re still together, then you have done amazingly well and things will get better.
Bring back date night
It’s very common for couples at the beginning of their relationship to organise a date night at least once a month. Date night allows couples to find a mutually enjoyable activity, get dressed up (or down), and spend a few hours uninterrupted in each other’s company. Many couples think that they don’t have time for date night. Busy schedules make it seem impossible. But it’s important to bring date night back if your relationship needs a new breath of life.
Getting ready for a date night is half of the fun and it will make your partner feel special to know that you made an effort just for them. Although choosing the right activity is important, you shouldn’t feel restricted to doing something conventional. You could watch a movie under the stars, visit a gin distillery, or enter a video game tournament.
Find a new shared passion
Is there a sport or activity that you’ve always wanted to try? If so, then suggest it to your partner. Finding a new passion that both you and your partner could enjoy can bring the spark back. It will add a new dimension to the relationship. Whether you want to learn to salsa dance, or become a world-class rock climber, there’s likely to be a range of classes and centres available in your local area. If you’re not a particularly active couple there are a range of more sedentary activities that you and your partner could try. Knitting, gardening, puzzles, kombucha making, and baking can all be done at home with minimal physical effort.
Revamp your look
Sometimes the spark can start to fizzle out in a relationship because of a lack of confidence. Bodies change, day to day life can take a toll, and it can ultimately lead to low self-esteem. Whilst self-love comes from within and it can’t necessarily be bought, revamping your look can make you feel better about your appearance. A new haircut or some new clothes can make all the difference. Once you’re feeling more positive and confident your partner should be able to notice the difference. It will make you irresistible.
Make the bedroom fun again
Sex doesn’t need to be regimented. The bedroom can be fun, playful and intimate. You could buy new lingerie that makes you feel good and makes them incredibly aroused. Alternatively you could have an honest and open discussion about using sex toys. Sex toys aren’t the taboo they used to be. Chances are that a large proportion of the people you know own at least one! Often people see the word ‘sex toy’ and immediately think of dildo’s and vibrators. But there is lots of variety out there from pleasure rings and love eggs to delay spray that will let him fuck for longer. Researching the wide and wonderful world of adult toys, and choosing a toy together can be incredibly intimate. It will also help bring you closer as a couple.