Knowing whether your male friend has feelings for you can be extremely difficult. When you have been friends with somebody for a while you forget what’s ‘normal’. Read this blog post to see if your male friend has a crush on you, or is just genuinely being themselves. It could save you a lot of heartache and awkwardness!
He makes an effort to be near you
Men are natural hunters when it comes to dating. They enjoy the chase of a hunt. This means that if your male friend is constantly trying to spend time with you, or be near you, then it’s highly likely that they see a future with you. This can manifest itself in various ways. If you’re at university, your male friend might insist on walking with you to lectures. If you work in an office environment, your male friend might consistently offer to do coffee runs with you. Men typically only make an effort if they are genuinely interested. So if they are showing you signs like this, then it means they’re keen to get to know you more.
He is protective over you
If your male friend likes you, then he will want to protect you. This may mean holding your hand during a horror movie, giving you an umbrella when it rains, or defending you when others besmirch your good name!
He actively listens to what you have to say
If your male friend genuinely likes you, he will actively listen to what you say. Active listening requires the listener to fully concentrate, understand the message, and remember what they have been told. How can you tell if your friend is actively listening? Well, they will ask you relevant questions. They will probe you for more information. They might even reply with an anecdote or two to make you feel better. This will prove that they have been paying attention.
He initiates contact
Guys aren’t exactly touchy feely unless they have genuine feelings for a person. Your male friend might brush his hand against yours as you walk, or touch your hand when he passes you a drink, for example. These acts are subtle, and ordinarily you wouldn’t think anything of it in isolation. However, if he initiates contact a lot, it’s a proof-positive sign that he has feelings for you.
He compliments you
This can be compliments on your looks, how you dress, your personality, your sense of humour – literally anything!
He opens up to you and expresses himself
Most men are reluctant to open up and express how they really feel. Especially when times are tough, or if they are struggling. This is because men usually express their feelings differently to women. First of all, they have more control over their facial expressions, where most feelings are communicated. Secondly, there is a lot of stigma attached to men crying, or asking for help. If your male friend expresses himself and tells you how he really feels this shows that he’s willing to be vulnerable in front of you. Men do not show this side of them to many people in their social circle.
His love life is a mess
Just because your male friend has feelings for you, it doesn’t mean that he may not have an active romantic life. However, it could be a mess. Your male friend may consistently go for the wrong type of person meaning they regularly end up getting hurt. Or, on the flip side, they might never demonstrate any interest in having a serious relationship with anybody. Another possibility is that he talks about his sexual affairs and relationships in front of you on purpose. If he does this excessively, it is obvious that he wants to see your reaction. He’ll be seeking to expose your jealous side.
He regularly flirts with you
This is probably one of the most obvious ways to know that your male friend has feelings for you. But sometimes it can be difficult to know if a male friend is flirtatious with just you, or you and everybody else. Over text, and through other online communication you may be able to gauge this by the use of emoji’s, sexual innuendos, or his eagerness to discuss sex, sex toys, or porn. In person, one of the biggest signs will be your friend’s body language. If he’s flirting, he’ll lean into you while talking with you. Other body language indicators include angling his body toward you, making eye contact, and keeping his feet faced towards you. He may also tilt his head.
He gets jealous
Some male friends may get jealous when other men express an interest in you. This can be direct interest i.e. openly saying that they find you attractive, or indirect interest i.e. a man checking you out on the street. It is not uncommon for men to find such behaviour infuriating, especially if they only have eyes for you. As a coping mechanism they may become over protective over you, or criticise any other male to prove that they are more worthy of your affection.
Now you know that your male friend is interested, you need to think about whether you feel the same. If not, visit eharmony, the home of online dating to find your perfect match!